Read: Genesis 20, Job 20, Matthew 20.
Meditated on: Genesis 20.
I have read 60 chapters as of today. I cannot remember a time before that I have read this amount of scripture. I am happy about this, though that means that my standard is low, which is not such a great thing...
Reading in Genesis certainly gives one some perspective...like a bird's-eye view of human stupidity and unfaithfulness. In chapter 20, Abraham again portrays Sarah as his sister instead of his wife, and again the ruler of the land takes her as his wife. It happened before in chapter 12, when Abraham travels to Egypt. He is making this decision based on the fear that, since Sarah is beautiful, the ruler will kill Abraham and take her anyway. I guess it's easier to give one's wife away voluntarily?
The stunning lack of faith in God's protection and provision, perpetrated twice in this particular fashion, at first leads me to judge Abraham's actions severely. But of course, that is not what reading the Bible is all about. I begin to think of my own, repeated lack of faith in certain areas of my life and can condemn myself even more severely than I can these old-testament patriarchs.
Most of all my Lord, I struggle with fear. I fear that I am not able enough, skilled enough, or smart enough to make good business decisions. Though time after time You have blessed my effort and brought me abundance, still I confess that I have a scarcity mentality.
I wish You would simply strike this fear from my character...yet I know this is rarely how You work. Instead, I trust that You will give me opportunities to grow through the fear. I trust that You will continue to bless my efforts and I praise You for allowing me to be satisfied in You as You glorify Yourself in me.
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